The Final Frontier?

The news is full of it at the moment – the Aurora Station that plans to be the first hotel in space. Hmm, so let’s forget for the moment that reports are saying that a 12 day trip into space, inclusive of transportation and accommodation, will cost $9.5million per person – and that was not a typo.

Would you?

Let’s say the price was comparable to a reasonably priced holiday to the Caribbean. Would you then? I think I would. The only thing that truly, truly puts me off is that cost which, let’s face it, is simply stupid.

When I say stupid, I’m sure that the transportation alone costs a fortune. You can’t blast into space for the price of a bus ticket after all, but still. And you’ll need to have a full physical and be proven to be physically fit before you’re permitted to go.Evidently, passengers will experience 3gs of gravitational force. Nothing like as much as a Formula One driver but maybe not for the faint-hearted.

For over nine million, I’d expect a level of luxury, not to mention gourmet food, but no. Guests will sleep in sleeping bags and the food will be freeze-dried. You’re also expected to do some work. Hey, I only mean tending some plants or something, you won’t be building roads, but nevertheless, for all that money?

You can even (wow, amazing) play virtual reality golf. (I can do that here but let’s forget about that).

One good thing though is that there’s no need to pack all your best frocks and jewellery. The space atmosphere has weird effects on the fluids in your body so you might look a bit weird. That sort of negates selfies. And you can expect your stomach to feel a bit wobbly because of the weightlessness. It’s a good job there are no gourmet foods then really.

And remember those G forces? Exposure to G forces can damage your bones and, I quote’ “changes the structure of the eyeball radically enough to affect sight”. Blimey, for all that money.

But here’s the absolute clincher. Because of what they call “the kinetics involved” (and no, I’m not at all sure what they mean either) then guests will not be able to have sex during their trip.

Well, that’s that, then.